You Don't Have to Be at Church to Hear God

While training for the Rock n' Roll Nashville Half Marathon, there was one Sunday morning when I decided to run instead of going to church. I usually did my long runs on Saturdays but this on weekend I had work and it was raining all day. So long run day had to fall on a Sunday. My dad was scheduled to go in to work on this Sunday morning because he had to go take a tent down in Memphis. So, logically, it would be best for me to go into work with him and run while he was in Memphis. Seeing as I would be running on a military base that I was familiar with, I had no worries regarding safety.

This particular Sunday was emotional for me, to say the least. I was still tired from work, not looking forward to the 12 miles I had to run and grieving for the loss of a little boy in Uganda.

Joshua was only one when I met him in 2013 while I was a HEAL intern. When I met him, he had recently had surgery on his leg for his sickle cell anemia. We would spend hours playing with him, singing his name and helping his mom redress his leg. His laugh could make any darkness disappear and his smile lit up the entire western hemisphere.

On April 14, Joshua passed away.

I found out a week after because I currently don't have a laptop and am using my mom's work laptop. Confusion, sadness, anger and guilt were just a few of the emotions I went through in that weekend. While I was at work, I would be fine and then all of the sudden be hit with a ton of bricks, my breath would be taken away and I would have to brace myself.

So on Sunday, when I started running, I wasn't particularly ready for the challenge I was about to embark.

Mile one was slow. Mile two is a long stretch of concrete on the east side of the base. It was cool, which I was grateful for, but still, my head was 12,931 miles (by plane) away. If you look at my stats from that run, at mile three, you can tell, something happened.

It's not uncommon to see wildlife on the base. Deer, raccoons, foxes, opossums, skunks and plenty of birds and squirrels are frequent. This morning, I approached a bend in the road I was running and saw a deer. She was a pretty one and once she saw me, she took off around the bend I was about to take.

Note: These aren't the deer I saw. I don't have my phone when I run.

As I rounded the bend, four more deer were there, for a total of five deer. Because there was a fence on either side of the road, the deer didn't have any way to run except in the same direction as me. They ran with me, well, ahead of me, for almost half a mile. The clouds opened and the sun lit up the road while a cool breeze whipped between the trees.

My first thought was "Okay, God. Okay. I hear you."

I took the five deer as a sign from God telling me that Joshua was okay and everything else was going to be okay too. I felt a sense of calm wash over me. Looking back at the stats, my speed went up and my pace was better after this moment.

Have you ever had that moment? When you have to take a moment and say "Okay, God. You've got this, I have to trust you." I have those moments daily. I have to constantly remind myself that even if I don't got this, God's got this.

Remember, the same God who created the sky, the oceans, the mountains, the Joshua trees in California, created YOU with the same dedication, love and master skill that a potter has when making a piece of out clay. God loves you more than a fish loves water, a chinchilla loves the cold and my dog loves her blankie. His love for you is unmeasurable.